Saturday, June 15, 2013

The Madness of E3 - A Psycho Saturday Review by Knightedrik




Ladies and Gentlemen, This match is scheduled for Nine rounds..

In this corner weighing in at a sleek 3.2 lbs,  with an 80's eraser head haircut,  the console that does not want to be seen. PPPPPllaystation 4!

And his opponent, weighting in at whopping 406.3 lbs,  standing in a puddle of piss, with a snot bubble hanging out of his nose.. The Xbox ONE.

Ref: "Ok you two, I want a good clean fight.. no hitting below disc tray... When your both ready touch controllers and come out fighting."

Round 1... Ding!

Xbox One: "I'm gonna kill you"
 PS4: "We'll see about that."

Xbox one: "With me, you can chat with your friends on Skype!"

PS4: "Yeah, well fuck you.. I can play used games."


Round 2.. Ding!

Xbox one: "With Xbox, you can be online all the time, as a matter of fact.. it's mandatory!"

PS4: "I actually HAVE a life, and people will WANT to turn me on every 24 hours.

Round 3... Ding!

Xbox: "I see you've finally come over to the dark side and started charging people to play online.. you should have done that from the start. Dumbass"

PS4: "Yes if was free to play online for 7 years..  But plus subscribers get tons of free shit every year, and now they will continue to receive that awesome stuff, and play online for free.. We took the money from plus and build me, and made plus even better than it ever was. And yes, Did I mention plus subscribers will still get to play on for free!. By the way.. what the fuck did you do with the 200 million you made off live?"

Round 4... Ding!

Ps4: "And by the way, fuck Skype, on PS4 you can LIVE STREAM your friends game, and even take over and help them out."

Round 5... Ding!
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.
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PS4: "Fuck you Kinect.. stop staring at me."

Round 6... Ding!

Xbox: "Yeah well, at least we don't have a $700 price tag!"

PS4: "That was last gen, and we actually lost money with every PS3 sold. And by the way, suck my dick.. the price is $399" 

Round 7... Ding!

Xbox: "You know what, I'm leaving.. fuck you and your company.. I'm not even gonna bother to answer questions from my fans.."

PS4: "That's right, Keep on walking bitch.. See you in 7 years with your next piece of inferior shit!"

Round 8... Ding!

Ps4: "Who wants free shit?"

The winner and still heavyweight champion of the world.. Playstation 4!

Xbox: "I'll be back."
PS4"Your still here? Don't you have some people to pay off?"  

     

         

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