All week this week I've been so incredibly sick.. it's just sad. I have something that's somewhat more than a cold, yet less than the flu. It started as like a head cold, and then settled in my chest. I don't really know how I contracted this bullshit, but I have a good idea.
Last week, I did something.. something so horrible that I feel bad even saying it out loud. That's right, I went shopping at Wal-Mart. It must have been one of those disgusting fucking breeders, that was spreading their bullshit germs all over everything. You know that kind of people.. The disgusting, nasty, waste of human skin, breeders with their 14 kids (that their paying no attention to..), coughing and spreading their nasty scum all over everything in the entire store. There must be a sign I keep missing at the door to Wal-Mart that says, "Welcome to Wal-Mart, let your stupid fucking kids go ape shit." Anyway.. I don't have to explain any further.. you people shop there.. you have to, I'm sure my $76.00 purchase didn't set them for life. Ain't that some shit, I go in there for a certain specific ink pen, that it seems they only sell there, and end up with 80 bucks worth of shit. Pilot Precise V5 Rolling ball ink pen.. best writing tool ever invented.
So, I really didn't mean for this blog entry to end up being filled with Wal-Mart hate.. It's just kind of an natural response I have. I really hate Wal-Mart...
Anyway.. This entry is about the things in the news the last couple of days that has really been pissing me off.. This moronic shit, not only gets way too much air-time.. but it is mostly problems that could be solved instantly. Here are the top 5 thing that have pissed me off in the last week, while I've been sick on the couch, because of the fucking Wal-mart folk.
5. Pigs with Lipstick..
What the hell? I knew Obama was an inexperienced moron, but.. damn! I mean, how much more scandel does the average American need? Slumlords, Crazy premiscious preachers, picking a complete duchbag for VP, having zero experience, being compaired to jesus, and now this 4th grade insult bullshit.. My god!! Enough already.. I mean.. when your running against a WAR HERO, with over 30 years of service and 20 something years of politician experience.. you'd think he'd just shut the fuck up and state only facts. John McCain was a P.O.W., and was tortured, as the enemy tried like hell to get information that would hurt our country.. and John told them to go fuck theirself.. and reset his own broken bones. I just don't see a decision that need to be made here.. If you vote for Obama.. your a fucking retard.
My advice: Sit Obama down and show him the tapes of John Kerry trying to crack jokes 4 years ago.. and explain what happened.
4. New for sale on eBay: Michael Jackson's unwashed underware.
Holy SHIT!!.. I guess you really can buy anything on eBay! Do everybody a favor, if you bid on this.. please find a way to let everybody know who you are.. so we can stay far the fuck away for you.
My advice: What the fuck... I'm speechless...
3. AGAIN with the O.J. Simpson Bullshit?!?!
Now let me get this straight, O.J. kills 2 people.. gets aquitted, causes tons more bullshit.. and they let him off the hook.. And now he goes to court AGAIN.. this time for stealing shit at gunpoint. Is it me, or is this going against everything that is the normal..? Let's run the checklist:
A> Is O.J. rich? X
B> Is O.J. well liked? X
C> Is O.J. dating anybody rich or well liked? X
D> Is Johnny Cochren still dead? O
Ok.. now.. why the fuck isn't he in jail already? If you get aquitted for a double homicide.. you should just pack your shit.. leave the country.. and never be seen again. Out of sight.. out of mind.. but noooo this moron decides it's a good idea to go into a casino hotel with GUNS.. and a fucking POSSE.. and gets himself caught on audiotape threating people. Does he WANT to go to jail? What the hell?
My advice: Pay Fred Goldman, and die.
2. Free Credit Report.com Commericals
With all the stalkers, murders, felons, and people who've done time for assault.. NOBODY's got pissed off enough to tie these fuckers to a random railroad track.. and record it so the whole world can watch it on youtube and cheer. This is the most annoying shit I have ever seen. You people know who the hell i'm talking about.. These 3 fucking guys.. have got so annoying.. that they have passed up the former record holder, Smiling Bob, with flying colors.
My advice: Railroad track, hammer, creativity
1. Little Girl lost
Caylee Anthony, the little girl on the news everyday.. still missing.. her mother seemingly doesn't know where she is. Her mothers car smells like a human dead body, and chemicals.. When it comes down to it, the mother probably drugged the child so her hood rat ass could go clubbing with her friends, and overdosed this poor little child.
Her mother is the biggest lying piece of shit I have ever seen. I guarentee you that for just 5 minutes alone with this skank bitch, me and Mr. Telephone book could get the truth out of her on where her daughter is. This is one of the rare cases that the police need to beat the living shit out of this bitch until she gives up the whereabouts of this child, dead or alive. I can't believe there are people out there that would treat their children this way. It's all just completely insane.
My advice: I think I've said enough..
Thursday, September 11, 2008
Friday, September 5, 2008
Ok.. Whats pissing me off today?
Actually this ones been pissing me off for quite some time. Why are the sellers on Amazon.com so fucking stupid? Honestly.. It blows the mind. There should seriously be an IQ test given to you when you sign up. I mean.. it seems they can enter their payment information and everything ok.. but after that.. what the fuck happens?
So this will probably be the first of a few posts on the Amazon.com hilarity. I'm mainly posting this.. so people will read it and learn shit. Because so far it's a fucking joke. Here we go.. this is the top five things that piss me off about Amazon sellers:
5> People with zero positive feedback.
Once in a while you'll be seeking to buy shit on Amazon.. some new headphones, a new ps3 controller.. I don't know what the fuck you people like.. just insert generic shitty item here. Anyway, eventually you'll come across these people. The zero positive feedback people. This could also work for Ebay folks.. but fuck ebay, ebay sucks. And thats a different post altogether. Now.. common sense tell us, that if you screw up your first sale.. and piss off your first buyer. Then you might want to A> Quit selling altogether, B> Offer something for free to make buyer happy.. thus getting them to remove the shitty feedback, C> Kill yourself, or D> Pick two of the above. But alas not everybody knows what the hell they are doing. My advice to these people: Cancel your account, and restart.. but this time, dont be a complete fuck-up. Nobody's gonna buy from you if you can't even make your first feedback positive.
4> People with MASSIVE feedback.
Ok.. fuck you people. No.. not you.. the massive feedback people. How dare you sell something with a comment like:
"Why save pennies shopping with small time sellers, buy from us.. our feedback is 250,000 strong."
Fuck you people.. in the ass, with a rocket launcher. 250,000 feedback..? Fucker, YOU are a small time seller. What? You think you are the Wal-Mart of Amazon sales? And just because you had the available funds to buy up 20,000 copies of "My Name is Earl: Season 1", that your better than a seller with 85 continous positive feedbacks? And what the hell? Small time sellers ARE Amazon.. they make up like 80% of Amazon sellers.. and fuck you for pissing on someones American dream. What your really saying when you post an item with a comment like that is:
"Hi, buy from us.. We're complete dicks.. and we'll never, ever answer your email."
My advice to these people: Small time sellers are part of what makes this country great. It's the American dream to start up a small business and watch it grow. Instead of being a self-rightious dickhead, just do everybody a favor.. and throw yourself under a bus.
3> People who never answer emails.
Ok.. you were smart enough to create and account, input your finanical information so you can get paid, and post an item for sale. And lets say.. I happen to be scrolling thru the stuff for sale at Amazon.. and I see your item, and i'm and intrested buyer. So, I send you an email asking about the condition of the item or if it has everything that originally came with the item. And I wait, and wait, and wait, and what the fuck? It's been 3 days, and I still dont have an answer to my email question..?!? So..... you don't really want to sell shit? You just want people to know what shit you have? Because if I send you and email and you dont answer it.. at least within 72 hours.. that means 1 of 2 things: 1> You can give a fuck about my question. or 2> You won't send the item if I order it for at least 4 days. Either way.. what the fuck? My advice to these people.. Answer my fucking email. If you don't really want to sell shit, do what everybody else who doesnt want to sell shit does.. Open a shop at a flea market.
2> Video Stores that sell on Amazon
I mainly shop at Amazon for media. Mostly video games and DVDs. I do this because.. A> I can choose the condition of the item I want, and B> I hate buying from Blockbuster/Hollywood Video/Gamestop/EBgames/etc.. Now, that being said.. Why do I go to Amazon and see listings for some shitty video store in West Virginia? I'm sure I'm in the majority on this one.. When you buy something online, you want to get that item in the best condition as possible. Right? So.. why the hell do they bother to list shit like this:
"Item is in 'like-new' condition. Contains game (with many scratches), and book, in rental box. Artwork was cut so it will fit into rental box. Rental box and disc have a non-removable security sticker on them."
Now, I ask you, how the fuck is that "like new"? Who the hell would buy that? Especially since they charge moronic prices. What are they thinking? "Well they can either buy this game new for $12.99, or they can buy this piece of shit for $24.99.." Advice: Die.
1> Lame ass comments
Alright, this is the one thing that pisses me off more than anything about Amazon sellers.. and its two catagories of people. I purchase alot of Playstation 2 games from Amazon.com.. and these sellers shouldnt even bother posting items for sale:
A> The No-Comment People
People who dont bother listing a comment.. at all. The items decription is completely blank. It just says "like new" and if you order the item its like playing russian roulette, with a 9mm handgun. Your gonna get screwed. If they cant even post a comment it means that they are selling a piece of shit.. and theres nothing good they can say about this item.
B> The Too Little Information People
This is a widespread problem with Amazon.. but for this post we'll say that its mainly for video games. I am a collector, and when I'm looking to buy games, there's only 3 things I want to see in the listing. "MINT, Black label-not greatest hits, complete" That's all that need to be said.. it covers condition, version, and if the game has everything it supposed to have with it. No collector will buy "greatest hits" games.. ever. They are worthless. Well, you say.. I have a complete collection of greatest hits games... That's great! Do you have a lighter? Good.. light them on fire, they are worth nothing. Anyway, back on subject.. if you see a one word comment on a listing.. that word had better be "mint".. or don't waste your time and money.
Now.. I hope we've learned something today. If your an honest person.. and you have alot of games or movies and stuff you no longer want or need.. then please, by all means, start up your own Amazon sellers account.. We need more honest, educated people selling items. But if you are already an Amazon seller, and you fall into one of the above numbered catagories.. then please do everybody a favor:
BUY A BULLET, AND RENT A GUN.
(But don't forget to cancel your amazon account first.)
Thanks for reading,
To my own little corner of the world. This is my first blog post on this site. I first off want to welcome anyone who wishes to read these posts to do so, but keep in mind.. most of the time, I'm constantly pissed off. This blog will contain some things that may sometimes offend certain people. And, really.. I don't fucking care. If you are offended.. go and read somebody elses blog.. Or watch PBS.. or continue downloading your Ricky Martin song collection. I don't give a shit. The point is.. most people are morons, some people are smart.. If your offended, guess which group you belong to? Congrats.. at least now, we know who my target audience is. So sit back, buckle the fuck up.. and enjoy. Because it only goes downhill from here.